23 Aug '12

BDSM Event Day 22: "It’s All in the Mind…Appreciating the Psychology of BDSM Romance" by Joey W. Hill plus 3 Giveaways!

Posted in Events, Uncategorized / 79 Comments

Welcome to Day Twenty Two of the BDSM Appreciation Event here at Scorching Book Reviews. So far we still have the wonderful Kele Moon giving away her Eden series,the lovely Cari Silverwood giving away a bookJoely Sue Burkhart giving away her latest release, Eve Berlin giving away the first book in a wonderful seriesSherri Hayes giving away a copy of Need, there’s a giveaway on Eliza Gayles post, the marvelous Bridget Midway is also hosting a giveaway, an amazing giveaway from Lissa Matthews, a fab giveaway from the amazing Kim Dare, a femDom giveaway from Lucy Felthouse, A Lexi Blake giveaway, A Portia Da Costa Giveaway, a Kelly Jamieson Giveaway, a Cassandra Carr giveaway, a HC Brown giveaway , two giveaways from Sierra Cartwright and there is also a fabulous article by Reggie and kasi Alexander on the BDSM lifestyle. Just Click on the name in the above paragraph to play along. There is also an amazing excerpt (which I think may be exclusive…not sure) from Cherise Sinclair’s new book (Xavier…be still my beating heart). There is also an amazing International giveaway of a SIGNED hardback copy of The Siren by Tiffany Reisz 

Remember to use the Rafflecopter form or follow any additional instructions you will not be entered.

Today, I introduce the lady who first introduced me to BDSM outside of a club. Joey W.Hill was the first author I read who showed me that this isn’t just about sex, that some people practice this as a lifestyle. Her story Natural Desire is the first FemDom story I ever read and it remains a favorite and constant re-read.

Here’s what she has to say

Imagine a Master, a handsome sexual Dominant who craves that sweet drug of female submission, her devotion and service. He wants to immerse her in the pleasure he can give to her when he has her restrained or applies the right kind of punishment. So as she’s naked and on her knees, he captures one nipple in thumb and forefinger and starts to apply pressure, increasing it so gradually that the discomfort stimulates a pleasurable response. When she realizes he’s doing it deliberately, her breath gets more shallow. The soft sound of her moistening her lips tells him she’s already imagining what other things he’ll do to her while she’s under his command. If he orders her to stand so he can slide his fingers between her legs, he knows he’ll find she’s already wet.

This Master is in a wheelchair and blind, which is why he hears her moistening her lips, and orders her to stand to more easily test her arousal. How can he be an effective Master? He can’t physically dominate her. Or can he?

Yes, he can, because the core of Dominance and submission isn’t physical strength, but psychological Mastery. That very thing is what keeps me fascinated with writing BDSM romance, and exploring it in new and different ways in every book. Those writers who say “there’s only so many ways to put tab A into slot B” are missing the fact that the experiences and emotions we bring to every BDSM scenario result in infinite outcomes.

When I wrote my first BDSM romance, I had never visited a BDSM Internet site, club or munch. I had no contact with people active in the lifestyle. What I had was my own awakening submissive desires and fantasies that I’d never articulated. Not until I wrote a book where my hero became, not just a sexy hero, but a Dom who took the reins from the heroine and helped her embrace self-confidence and love again by Mastering her. Though I’ve learned enough about BDSM mechanics since then to integrate them into my stories (let’s face it, there are so many fun restraint systems and toys out there, why not use them? lol), the main D/s elements always focus on the emotional interchange between the two characters.

Now I admit, once I learned how much “stuff” there was out there in the BDSM world – forums, equipment, terminology, etc – I worried I might be wrong, that I was discounting the importance of the trappings. After all, I was still learning what being a sub was all about. Then I had a direct experience that proved to me once and for all that the most powerful expressions of D/s don’t require handcuffs or a dictionary of BDSM terms.

Remarkably, it wasn’t a sexual scenario. It happened with my boss (absolutely NO feelings of that nature there, I can assure the world). However, that short interaction had such a profound impact on me, I made it into a scene in Board Resolution, the first of the Knights of the Board Room series. Here’s a snippet from it.

* * * * *

Matt had come back from the dinner break early, ostensibly to make a couple of phone calls, but there was always the possibility that he would see Savannah and could spar with her for a few enjoyable moments.
  
It made him frown, though, knowing he would find her in her office. She went on business luncheons, attended banquets and gala events with the right escorts, but never did he see her sitting on the edge of one of the downtown fountains, eating a sandwich and taking in the pigeons’ play, engaging in idle people watching. Or, even more shocking, out with a girlfriend, laughing, having some female conversation. Doing some playful male bashing.
“She’s not a woman, she’s a fucking robot,” he’d heard one competitor say. “Geoffrey Tennyson didn’t spawn her, he had her built in one of his plants.”
It had made Matt angry, and he’d made sure to scuttle the man’s plans for overseas expansion with him. Lucas had pointed out it was an emotional, rather than a fiscally intelligent act, and he had not disagreed with that assessment. Nor had it erased his satisfaction in doing it. He wondered if Savannah realized she had a circle of devoted knights trying to protect her from harm when she wouldn’t even let them into the inner circle of her life. Geoffrey was gone, and what protection her father had provided, as well as the damage he had done, was gone. She was as alone in the world as a person could get. He wanted her in his world, and she wouldn’t even give him an opening to make a move in that direction.
He rounded the corner, his peripheral vision sharpened so he could see if she was in her office. The door was open, her desk light on. And she was standing on top of her desk.


She hadn’t taken off her shoes, and he assumed it was to give her extra height to reach her objective, though he shuddered to think about her stepping on her unstable wheeled office chair in those skinny heels.
He detoured. Determining in a few strides what she was doing, he quickened his pace.


Apparently a bulb had burned out in the incandescent ceiling lighting she preferred to fluorescent. Anal retentive plague that she was, she was changing it herself, rather than waiting to have a maintenance person with solid shoes and a ladder do it tomorrow. She was on the ball of one foot, the other off the ground, straining, her right breast clearly outlined against the fabric of her turquoise turtleneck. The ceiling was too high for her to use one hand to steady her upper body, and as she worked to free the panel over the light fixture, she was precariously balanced. When it came free with a jerk, she overbalanced.

Matt got there in time to clamp his hands on her hips, his palms curled over the hip bones, his fingers on the soft curves.
 “What are you doing? Get down from there.”
 She was flustered, and he didn’t often get to see that. She backed out of his hold, and he nipped the panel from her fingers, taking it to the floor.
 “I’m trying to change a light bulb.”
 “I can see that. Get down.”
 “I just need to—”
 “Get. Down. Now.”
 Instead of coming back with another sharp retort, he saw something incredible happen. A moment of confusion. Nervous tension. Something came over him, too, an instinct, and the remarkable feeling that a door had just swung wide open. And he wanted to test it.
“You heard me, Savannah,” Matt said softly. “Come here. Now.”

  
It was a long moment. Then she shifted her gaze away from his, down, and moved toward his reaching hands, her neck and cheeks flushed.

Still reeling from the revelation, he almost missed his cue, but he recovered in time to take her elbow as she reached down for him. He gripped her waist and she put her hands after a brief hesitation on his shoulders, curiously docile as he lifted her clear of the chair, pushing it out of his way, and lowered her to the floor.

It was a moment before he found his voice, and he managed to make it gentle, since she was blinking at him with the startled look of a deer, not anything like the Savannah he knew.
  
“Don’t you attend the corporate safety seminars you torture your employees with?”

He saw the snap as the spell was broken. She even took a defensive step back, looked around herself, and that familiar disdain and faint irritation took over her features.

“We fulfill all OSHA requirements, Kensington.”

“Oh, yeah. That was definitely an OSHA-approved maneuver.” He flicked a hand out, caught a loose lock of her hair, enjoyed her look of shocked anger at the casual familiarity.

 “I know you think you have to live up to your Savannah Cyborg image, but you don’t have to be and do everything yourself, you know.”

He actually saw a split second of hurt at the nickname that was used too often for her not to have overheard it countless times before. It made him angry with his clumsiness. And with her, for being so worthy of the name, but only in how she closed herself off to any advances of affection or friendship.

“You delegate administrative tasks to your assistants. Why can’t you let other people help you with things?” He let his concern for her show, hoping to amend that inadvertent barb. “Damn it, if you’d fallen, there’d have been no one to see you fall.”

“That’s the plan,” she said dryly. “Better to bust your backside when no one’s looking.”  Some of the spunk was returning, but in the shift of her eyes, he saw she knew something significant had happened. He wondered if she understood what she had revealed, if she even knew it about herself. 

The thought brought out a fierce possessiveness in him, a desire to crush anyone who’d taken advantage of such a sweet gift. He enjoyed the many faces and forms of sex, and having an excess of alpha in his personality, he’d often let the natural Dominant in him take over with his casual lovers who liked BDSM. The idea of exercising it in a less casual mode with the woman who’d become his obsession was so intoxicating he had a hard time keeping his cock settled in his trousers. Fortunately, she chose that moment to distract him.

“Fine.” She tossed her head, presented him with a bulb from her desk top. “You want to do maintenance, here’s your chance. And don’t worry. I’ll stand right here and catch you if you fall.”


* * * * *


Anyhow, the brief lightbulb “get down now” interchange with my boss (that part was the “trigger”, not all the rest of the romantic/sexy stuff I integrated for Matt and Savannah – laughter) tripped all my submissive tendencies and made me realize the mechanics are the very least of what makes BDSM romance powerful. That’s why I’ll always appreciate the psychological side of writing BDSM love stories the most.



Joey W. Hill has over 30 contemporary and paranormal erotic titles available, and is the recipient of the RT BookReviews Career Achievement Award for Erotic Romance. Find her at:


Website: www.storywitch.com                  
Twitter: @Joey W. Hill

Facebook: JoeyWHillAuthor                    


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79 Responses to “BDSM Event Day 22: "It’s All in the Mind…Appreciating the Psychology of BDSM Romance" by Joey W. Hill plus 3 Giveaways!”

  1. I really enjoyed reading your excerpt!! Your thoughts about the psychology of BDSM were insightful!! The mind is truly a powerful sex organ not enough people consider!!! Thank you for considering it!!! I look forward to reading your book and until then, I shall read one of your other books, Holding the Cards!! 😀

  2. Kaylyn, they've done a wonderful job with it, haven't they? I'm so excited about an event that appreciates the BDSM genre – can you imagine doing this 10 years ago? We really have progressed! Hope you enjoy my work.

    Elizabeth – grin – glad you liked that. Good luck in the giveaway, and you're very welcome!

    Ptufto, thank you for those kind words. Yes, it gets

  3. Christine A

    I am super excited for this giveaway. I haven't had a chance to reading of the books. Looking forward to them a lot.

    Thanks!

    your1chef at aol dot com

  4. Great post, I love learning from all of these authors. The snippet from Board Resolution was just hot enough to go along with my morning coffee 🙂

  5. Love the post. I am making my way through Masters of Shadlowland but will pick up Board series to follow. Love your books and your awesome insight into BDSM I have found out a lot of interesting things about myself by reading your books. Thanks so much

  6. I am a big fan of Ms. Hill and when anyone asks me to recommend a good BDSM author her name is the first to fall from my lips.

  7. I love Joey W. Hills The Vampire Queen series! I'm currently reading book 8 right now. I've never read anything BSDM before the start of that outstanding series. Wonderful excerpt Joey! Thank you for the chance to win! 🙂
    DeAnna Schultz

  8. Great article! Thanks!
    Love all the Knights of The Boardroom! You're right! There doesn't have to be any sex involved to get a sub feeling all gooey. For me it's simply about the control!
    The sex doesn't hurt! (smiles)
    AZKaren

  9. Christine, I always love to hear from someone new to my stuff. Hope you enjoy it!

    Cathy – lol – you must be in a cooler part of the country. our humidity this morning made me want to have lemonade to cool off, but whether you want to be heated up or need cooling off, the K&A guys can oblige (grin).

    Fingershankins, that's Cherise's work, correct? She does awesome

  10. Great post. Wonderful excerpt. Loved the comment about the OSHA-approved maneuver. Made me laugh. This book sounds fantastic.

    e.balinski(at)att(dot)net

  11. Hey Joey! All I can do after reading is nod, nod and nod. My view of BDSM is exactly what you pointed out. Starts in the mind with a little extra here and there according to needs. 😀

  12. Joanne – yes, folks seem to like that one (grin). I think it was a subliminal reminder of my corporate days, when we had to attend seminars on the proper way to open file drawers and how to minimize paper cuts (eye rolling). lol…

    Wendy, so much of it is very intuitive, isn't it? I remember the first time I walked into a BDSM club. It felt like home; I was surprised that I wasn&#

  13. I work in a bookshop and after reading that recent best seller to see what it was about, thought there must be better written erotica out there to recommend to customers. Luckily the next author I tried was Joey Hill, and I devoured the Board books, then went on to the Vampire Queen and Nature of Desire series. I loved the lot! It is a lifestyle I knew nothing about, and the psychology of it is

  14. Joey Hill introduced me to reading about BDSM, and I haven't looked back since–she hit a nerve I didn't know even existed in me and has made me feel more complete, for lack of a better word. I have read all of Joey's books–all of them have you on the edge of your seat from beginning to end–and there is one constant thread that I have found weaves through all her wonderful stories-

  15. I really know nothing about BDSM.
    From what I read in your books. It's just someone needing help out of the prison that holds them captive with fears and free from the demons that keep them there. It's trust,and love. I would very much like a copy. I want understand it more.

  16. Kath and Mary – wow! Thank you for those incredible compliments. I'm blown away. Kath, I have a great many readers who don't pursue BDSM in real life, but love exploring the psychology of it through these stories. It's a wonderful way to experience it, and I'm so glad you've enjoyed that journey with my characters.

    Mary, I'm so glad you were able to post (

  17. Thanks, kandj! From the psychology standpoint, it's one of my favorite scenes of this book (that and the scene at her father's funeral – wink). Glad you came by!

  18. Oh, forgot to add – headed off line for awhile – it's "date night" with the DH and we're going to watch a movie, but I'll check back in at bedtime and/or in the morning to handle any comments or questions. Thanks for a lovely day with you all!

  19. I loved your Nature Of Desire series and am dying to read the Vampire Queen series. Great Excerpt. Thx for giveaway.

    blinkysthebest at aol dot com

  20. I learned so much about bdsm from reading your stories, Joey. And the psychology of it is truly fascinating for this newbie.

    caity_mack at yahoo dot com

  21. where have I been, in a cave why haven't I read Joey Hill's books yet. Gotta go do some shopping :O)Carin
    mawmom at gmail dot com

  22. I have heard a lot of fantastic things about Joey's books but haven't read any…yet. I'm so impressed that she started writing BDSM after not knowing much about it and do so well!

  23. I think what fascinates me with BDSM is the psychological side as well. I haven't read any of Joey's books yet, but I truely can't wait to start reading her stories.

  24. Amazing! Can't wait to read your books! Love how you seem to embrace the phys side of BDSM.. So much is mental!
    modularmates(at0comcast(dot)net

  25. Great points on the ability of a Master to dominate with physical force. I love, love, love Joey's work as well as her connection to her fans.

    Her Vampires, her Knights, her Angels, Mermaids, Witches and Warlocks and all those wrapped up in the Nature of Desire… they all pull me into their world and I hate to have to leave when the story ends (good thing she likes to let us

  26. DarkBloodyVamp

    Thank you for your insight and the chance to win one of your books.

    redfirewood888(AT)yahoo(DOT)ca

    DarkBloodyVamp

  27. Gosh, Joey, I think you're shorter than I am. I'm assuming you were trying to change the light bulb? I hope there were low ceilings in the building. For some reason, I seem to have not taken the opportunity to read any of the Knights of The Board Room series. I know, I know. I'm just getting to crawl out from under my rock. 🙂

    luvfuzzzeeefaces at yahoo dot com

  28. What a great excerpt. Yeah I have giftcards, I'm off to buy it and read before I fall asleep and hopefully have some awesome dreams!! Thank you Joey for writing such wonderful books.

    proudarmymom32(at)yahoo(dot)com

  29. I just love this "light bulb moment," (yes, the double entendre is intended) for Matt. The entire Knights of the Boardroom series is simply not to be missed. Joey's exploration of the psychology of her characters and her character driven plots are simply exceptional. As Mary said, they are books you will re-read often. Thanks for another great interview Joey.

    (aka

  30. This was actually the first Joey book I've read. That scene, by far was my favorite one…and lead me to the "Nature Of Desire" series (my ultimate fave of Joey's).

  31. Great excerpt and post, thank you for sharing. I am still working my way through the Vampire Queen books (I think "Vampire Instinct" is still my favorite right now) and the mermaid series (Daughters of Ariane) so I still have plenty of your wonderful titles to look forward to. Thanks for the visit!

  32. Wow – I woke up to a plethora of wonderful comments – thank you all! A special thank you to those who are new to my work and are considering giving it a try. I hope you find the journey worthwhile. And a warm hug to my existing readers who had such good things to say! Just a few quick thoughts –

    Lona, I hope you enjoy my vampires as much as you've enjoyed my contemporary heroes/

  33. I love Joey Hill, Especially the guys.. Loved reading how they all came together and then found their special girl.. Can't wait till i can get ahold of some the others.

  34. Theresa, I like their background as well. One day I'd like to do a vignette about the first time all the K&A men acknowledged their bond with one another (wink). Hope to have Max and Janet's story in to the publisher by the end of the year so we can visit their world again!

  35. I loved that excerpt! This was the first book of Joey's that I've bought. I'm definitely going to buying more! Loved it!

    suz2(at)cox(dot)net

  36. Susan, glad you took the plunge with Matt and Savannah. Hope you enjoy the rest of "the boys" as well. If you do, as mentioned earlier, there are a couple free download vignettes on the fan forum (www.jwhconnection.com) revisiting characters from this series that are fun to read.

    Jessie, from working in an office, I know often you'll get old and gray waiting for

  37. Love the post. Love reading about new authors and their books. These kind were only recently catching my attention and loved what I read so far. I have a feeling I will be plunging into your books too… 😀

  38. I love Joey Hill's books and, until I was informed that her books were BDSM, I was under the impression that she just wrote strong characters who knew what they wanted! Great insight and always an eye opening experience with each book I enjoy of Joey's!

  39. Great post and great to learn how you incorporate life events into your stories. I've read all the Knights stories and am waiting for more! Love, love, loved them all 😉

    Eva
    evitap67(at)gmail(dot)com

  40. Great post. Really enjoyed the excerpt. Have added the Knights series to my to buy list. Thanks for the giveaway.

  41. Great Interview Joey! I love your books and I have chatted with you before in LA chat and on many blogs and can say that I like you as a person also. I love that you interact so much with your fans on blogs, FB and JWH connection. It makes us feel more and more connected to the books when we have our questions answered by you. I have read most of your books and VQ is up at the top of my fave

  42. Seelk, please plunge! I'd love to hear what you think of them. Though I always want my readers to have a great experience, I welcome critical feedback as well. It helps me as a writer, to hear pros and cons. :> Mary, thanks for the vote of confidence, hon!

    Christina wrote "I have never read any of Joey's books. but I am starting to think i really need to."

  43. Now I'm more encouraged than ever to read the Joey W. Hill book I have on my shelf! Thank you for the well-written excerpt!

    What I know about BDSM is reinforced by what you wrote, the psychology is the key and foundation to everything. Without it, the relationship can become very dysfunctional and not at all pleasurable.

    Thank you for your contribution to the BDSM

  44. I am finding so many new books to read.

    My credit card will be begging for mercy.

    Thank you for the great giveaway!

  45. There is that small Elite Group of Authors where their Amazing Writing sets them in a Catagory all their own…Joey W Hill is one of those select few that you just cannot get enough of….with all her releases, I physically have to buy the paperback version as well as the eBook version. Yes I might be strange, but for Us Avid Readers, I'm sure you'll understand. Ms. Hill is in a class all

  46. Amen to everything you've said. It's all about the emotions and the love. That they enjoy the kink, as well, is just a bonus. I can't wait until I can read for fun again, because so many of your books have been recommended to me and are waiting for me on my Kindle.

    Thanks, also, for writing a character with a disability. I have a paraplegic heroine in book 7 of my series (

  47. I love Joey's Vampire Queen books. I haven't read any of the Knights of the Boardroom. I will definitely have to try them.

  48. @Kallypso Masters

    Kally, thank you for that, hon! And I completely understand about the having time to read thing. I really miss being able to pleasure read. But we'll look forward to the wonderful stories you'll write instead – including the one about the character with a disability. I know readers respond very strongly (and

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